jen (emberose) wrote,
jen
emberose

Day 1,000

The reason this blog post is titled "Day 1,000" is because that is how many days I have had a headache, in a row. Not the same headache, thankfully. But each and every day of the past 1,000 days, I have had at least one headache (I go through cycles of waking up with a headache daily and then occasionally having at least one other throughout the day - every now and then I don't wake up with a headache, but that is rare). Some of you know, some of you do not, but I had four seizures back in late September of 2012. (Never had had them before. Thankfully haven't had any since.) The last thing I remember is the wee hours of the morning Thursday going into Friday. And then, the next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital on Saturday, which was October 1st. Every day since then, I've had daily headaches. And on top of that, they are migraines. Every day. It feels like a steel rod from the front of my head to the back of my head just right of center. Sometimes I get auras. Sometimes they're unbearable. Sometimes they're tolerable and don't affect my day too much. But collectively, they are exhausting. I'll have the occasional tension headache still as well (a tight band at the base of my skull/top of my neck). (The ultimate "cause" of my seizures was just determined to be I had run myself down to the point of exhaustion and my body/brain said, "Enough!" No tumors. No physical reason has shown up on any of the multitude of tests I had at the time and since from three different neurologists. The second one I saw told me she thinks the additional electrical impulses of the seizures "triggered" something that is causing the headaches, but have never gotten a clear-cut explanation beyond that.) I've tried various preventative medicine regimens, to no effect, and I have medicines for when they happen, which takes care of them more times than not. But I keep having them every. single. day. Granted, by my own admission, I haven't been back to the neurologist in a couple months and did not try all treatment options that the most recent one had on her "list," but to be honest, I kind of got to a point where I was fed up with feeling like I was not getting anywhere. I know it is not going to change on its own, but after CranioSacral massages and a number of medicines that are not effective as preventatives, it's been rather discouraging. I'm thankful that I don't have a tumor. I'm thankful that I don't have a worse medical condition, but I am frustrated that my quality of life is being affected by this. Most days, I would rate my level of pain around a 4 out of a 10-point scale. But the days where I have a headache that is around a 7 out of 10, those are harder to take. Thankfully, those don't happen all that often. I think I'm back to a point now where I'm ready to set up an appointment and see what's next on the "list" to see if I can get some relief. It's just been hard trying things and having them not work. It gets to be tiring and discouraging hoping that the next thing will be "it," and having it not be the case. But, as I said, it's not going to change with doing nothing, unfortunately. Wish me luck that the cycle is broken soon. I would love to have a day without a headache!

[Sorry if this is jumbled... started writing and this is what came out {cross-posted from my blog jensroundcorner.blogspot.com}]
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